Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Derailed Domestic Goddess

We get in a funk. We sail along for a few days, staying on top of the laundry, getting all of the spaghetti scraped off the floor, keeping the kids bathed and somewhat clothed, we even get dressed. Dressed being the usual changing out of my pajama pants into my yoga pants, throwing my hair back in a ponytail, quick brush of the teeth, and ready to take on the world, or at least the day.

Everyone is (kind of) where they are supposed to be working in the machine of the day. Things are running pretty smoothly, “I can do this!” you think to yourself, somewhat smugly.

Pfft, homeschooling, four kids, nursing baby, five bedroom house, self employed, school, church,relationships, I got this.

And then “it” comes. It may be an afternoon, a day, or a week. Sometimes it can turn into a whole season.

Oh no!


We lose it. We lose the rhythm of this beautifully chugging along maternal, domestic, relationship, marriage, friendship, financial train.

Rhythm? Some of you are saying.

How about the whole train and caboose getting completely derailed! (Domestic goddess train.Track four. Derailed. Send for cleanup.)

We find ourselves in the midst of it. A dirty kitchen that isn’t just...dirty.
I saw a quote the other day that went something like this,

“Let your house be dirty enough to be happy but clean enough to be healthy.”

Can we just admit that most of the time we are borderline and probably somewhere on the wrong side of the border.

I mean days worth of dishes in the sink,  lunch plates shoved to the middle of the table so we can eat dinner. Dinner, you say!? Oh right, you don’t do cereal for dinner or processed corndogs with a side of something canned? Doh!

and as we fret about the mounting DHEC situation in the kitchen we catch a quick glance in the mirror.


and not the, “Woah..who is THAT hottie?” type of thought.

 Hmm..when did I last shower? It was going to be after my workout (which I never got to).Then the spit up, mud, and snot (my own and my kids during allergy season) all kind of rubbed and blended together into this wonderful (ahem) aroma. The grey hairs are coming in more frequently and I don’t think I have shaved since Christmas break.

Then there is the peeking through the curtains to make sure the neighbors aren't outside to see and smell my unkempt self. I make a mad dash to the mailbox (hoping my reward for my stealthy door- to- mailbox maneuver will be this week's US weekly). But instead, its a pile of bills added onto a month when I have already been trying to play houdini with the family budget.

When will we ever be able to pay off our debt and save for retirement when we can’t keep up most months? sigh.

Back inside I am teaching lessons in first grade and Preschool, habit training, and teaching life skills. Wondering which curriculum is right and if we are doing enough “school.”

When we slip into these times it is because we have lost our perspective. Our eternal perspective. Everything changes when we see things through our Fathers eyes with the goal as heaven. We live and breathe differently, we make decisions differently, we relate differently.

You see, the end goals are not a clean house, obedient and college educated children, a house full of nice stuff, and money stashed away in the bank for retirement.

We are not training our children for Harvard, we are training them for the Kingdom. We are not working for retirement, we are working towards Heaven. We are so wrapped up in getting them on the track to the best college and the best career. Everyone is in this sport or that program. Rush.Rush. Rush. Push.Push.Push.

Did you hear that?

That was just our  kids childhood exiting left stage, in a whirlwind tornado.

I realized a few months ago that I was rushing through the valuable things in our morning routine, soaking, bible study, habit training etc to get to the “school” part of the day. I was totally missing the boat. You see, that part of our morning is our education. It is LIFE. Whatever academics we get done afterwards is ok. I have had to put my trust in the Lord that he has a plan and a purpose for my children. When we seek Him first those things will be accomplished.

When our focus in life is on getting out of debt and saving for retirement ;that becomes an idol. Our focus is retirement security, when God is our security.
We are called to be wise stewards of our money. But an idol and focus in the wrong place can move us to make decisions to afford this false security instead of making decisions for the sake of the Kingdom.

When we strain and strive for a clean house beyond our capacity, we forfeit the day that God has planned for us.
How many times have you been aggravated by someone messing up something you just cleaned. How many times have you ignored a training opportunity or a chance to play with your kid  to get your chore finished?

Colossians 3:2 tells us to set our minds on things above, not on earthly things.

What is it, in this moment, that you have as an idol or are holding in light of a lie of the world? Can you turn it over to the hands of your heavenly father for His keeping? Can you repent for believing the lie that your security is found in this idol or this belief? Replace it with the truth that He is sovereign and that you are dearly and truly loved by Him.